A Perfect Dream

31/01: Dinner

I bought some fish,
some chicken,
some vegetables
and lots of rice.

En savoir plus ...

29/01: Disturbing Visions of Reality

It was dusk.

I lit a cigarette and stared out of the window at the last light, with a deep sense of apprehension. Julie London was singing Fly Me To The Moon in the background.

My thoughts were shattered by a commotion coming from the street below. Eight men in black suits were chasing a woman. The form of the small lithe body sprinting metres ahead of the men looked familiar. I could almost catch the scent of her thick lustrous hair, that I knew so well. It is Her.

En savoir plus ...

27/01: Turning Thirty

I was reading the above book by Mike Gayle for the second time round. When was the first time I read it? When I was turning thirty, two years back. -_-'

"Thirty means only going to the pub if there's somewhere to sit down. Thirty means owning at least one classical CD, even if it's Now That's What I Call Classical Vol 6. Thirty means calling off the search for the perfect partner because now, after all these years in the wilderness, you've finally found what you've been looking for."


"Thirty means only going to the pub if there's somewhere to sit down..."
Well, for me, I only go to low profile pubs where there is less of a crowd. ermm...In fact I only go to one regular joint, and I have my regular seat at that bar. Why the bar and not a table? Bar means I get the drinks fast. In fact my usual seat is directly in front of the tap. At most joints, the bar is usually where the regulars hang out. It is no different at this joint. They know me well enough to know I wanna be left alone when I am engrossed in my book or scribbling notes with a frown on my face. I have definitely stopped going to joints where I have to queue or where there is no seats. Gone were the days when I would Q for hours to get into a 'happening' joint to see and be seen. Age does this to you...

"...Thirty means owning at least one classical CD, even if it's Now That's What I Call Classical Vol 6...."
I own quite some classical CDs, all compilations. Can't tell the names of all the tracks. I just play them to set the mood, to get some peace at home. Popular TOP40 hits are no longer on my usual playlists...Most of the music spinning at my pad are usually moods; from Celtic to classical to kitaro to down-tempo. Most of the albums I own don't even have vocals. I guess this is what age does to you...

"...Thirty means calling off the search for the perfect partner because now, after all these years in the wilderness, you've finally found what you've been looking for."

This is the funny part. When I was turning thirty, I told myself I was bullshitting me by planning to propose to my then girlfriend of ten years. I couldn't imagine spending the rest of my life with her. I didn't wanna waste her time anymore. We broke up a couple months before I turned thirty. I went back in the wilderness again, played the field for awhile and realised that I was too tired for it all. I guess that is what age does to you..

Bah! Why am I talking about turning thirty, when I will be turning thirty three end of this year... I should be worrying about when I am gonna die.

PS: the quiz says that I am gonna die at the age of 76.1 from heart attack. Apparently I have more vitality then the average male (avg life span is 72). I don't want to live to that age. I wanna die happy, by 50.

18/01: Crane

We were sitting at the bar.

She was rampaging through her wallet for something. A small little piece of origami dropped out onto the counter. On closer look, it was a black crane about 1.5 cm small in all three dimensions.

She glanced over. I feigned extreme interest in the band.

En savoir plus ...

14/01: Angel

"Such as?" I asked.

"Intensity... I do things I have never done for another person. But for him I do... " Tasha was talking about her new guy Samuel "Sadly, sometimes it makes me darn pissed off with myself," she continued.

When I saw the above on Tetanus's blog(entry has since, been deleted by him for personal reasons), my feelings went topsy turvy again. On one end I was glad there are folks out there that felt the same way. It gave me the illusion that I am not going through this alone. Yet the thought of the intensity of the love I have for her, that made me do crazy things that I have never done before, brings a tinge of pain to my heart.

During a conversation one night at my usual pub, she mentioned a craving for chillied ikan bilis with nuts. I spent the next few weeks searching for it in vain. I finally made a trip to the supermarket and took a few hours of trial and error to fry a tuperware full of it for her. The look on her face was priceless when I passed it to her.

I enjoyed the weekends lounging on the sofa, with her head on my lap, watching anime. Once in while, I would gaze into her eyes with a silly grin on my face. When I noticed she hadn't been tidying her eyebrows, I would get a pair tweezers and spend the next 30 min cleaning it up for her while she watches TV. Then I would follow up by trimming and filing her nails.

When I was doing all the above, the only thought on my mind was how precious she was to me. I would be happy when she looks good. I would feel a sense of warmth when she flashed me a shy smile. I didn't think of how girlish those actions were. I was just happy to see her happy.

On hindsight, I realised these were things I have never done before for anyone in my life. These were things that would guarantee me the N01 Wuss spot amongst the boys. I would probably be ridiculed for months if they find out.

I remember a night when I had a bad bout of gastric pains caused me to puke through most of the night. I sent her a message in the middle of the night complaining about the pain.

The first thing I saw when I woke up in the morning was her beautiful face, crowned by her long lustrous hair. She was in a white fitting top and long flowing skirt. She was stroking my face softly and muttering some soothing words. She saw the SMS in the morning and rushed over to check on me.

Maybe it was a deception caused caused by the morning rays, maybe it was just my mind trying to shake off remnants of the dreams I had... at that split second when I opened my eyes, I was sure I saw... a pair of virgin white, soft, feathery wings folding on her back slowing and fading away...

12/01: The Voice in my head

The Voice in my head,
told me to club 'em with the mallet.
The Voice in my head,
instructed me carve 'em up with a chopper.
The Voice in my head,
bidded me to impale 'em with skewers.
The Voice in my head,
charged me to sprinkle salt on 'em.
The Voice in my head,
commanded me to roast 'em over a slow fire.

En savoir plus ...

07/01: Riddles, Mysteries and the rest of us.

I came across this part of the book 'Love & Other Recreational Sports' by John Dearie, that reminded me of what I always knew but have forgotten time and again in my dealings with the fairer(at times I do beg to defer) sex:

"....Life is full of riddles and mysteries, he said. It's important to know the difference.

"Which is?"

"Riddles have answers," he said. "They're meant to be figured out. Mysteries aren't. They don't have answers. Not for us anyway."

"So you are saying women falls into the mystery category and I'm just torturing myself trying to figure them out."

"I am saying you don't want to figure them out.""



En savoir plus ...

06/01: Games

The manipulator accuses the manipulated of manipulating.
The liar claims the victim of her lies is lying.
The runner becomes a groveller,
The one grovelled to runs off to grovel to another.
And he who was a groveller is a runner now.

What a crazy world this is.
What crazy games we all play.

06/01: His' N Her's

time: 0900hrs
Location: shower room

Cat : MEEOOW!!!(indignation)

(He stuck his head out of the shower)

Him: Ya, I know.. I told her about your sprain. She didn't seem to care. She even said I was trying to make her feel bad.

En savoir plus ...